OBL – Credit, Captures, and Conspirakooks

Obama Osama’s still dead (damn I’m going to miss that alliteration), days later.  But the story, like the war, goes on.  Of course, since there’s little new in news, we’re getting the stupid shit shook out.

Credit where credit is due – First of all, there’s enough credit to go around. This was truly an American victory, not a partisan one.  President Obama (famous for the use of the “I”) even says this.  Most of the credit goes to our intelligence community for working through all the info, and to the Navy Seal team that snuffed the bastard.  Credit goes to President Bush and his administration for putting things in place that got us the intelligence (as to whether the “enhanced interrogation techniques” were what gave us the intel will be bandied about and never really answered clearly, so knock it off).  And President Obama gets credit because, when the opportunity arose, he pulled the trigger on the operation.

Overall, it makes me want to start the Team America theme playing again.  But I’ll limit to a link.

Dead Bin Laden Pics – Why the fuck do we not have pics with the goat fucker with holes in his head, as well as video of the raid, by now? This primarily comes down to transparency.  We’ve seen plenty of death (including the live shots of people jumping to their death from the WTC) on TV of the real variety.  And yes, some people will find some tasteless use of the pics (see below), and some terrorists will use the pics as a training tool, and some human rights weenies will equate us with Hitler, Saddam, OBL, and Dick Cheney (come on, you know they hate Cheney more than Hitler) for releasing them.

Personally, I’m for the public display of corpses, if for no other reason than to make it clear that attacking America doesn’t make you a hero.  It makes you dead.  If it were up to me, his corpse would be hung in front of the White House for a week, before being desecrated and ejected into the ocean via wood chipper.

In other words, if we’re going to take on the responsibility of clearing the world of terrorists, we should display our handiwork and let the chips fall where they may.  So let’s see the video and pics.

Plus, there will be a video up minutes later set to the above song.  Can’t wait.

Dude, Where’s my Death Certificate? – Of course, I’ve also been hearing a few other things after the news broke.  They are as follows:

1. Osama’s been dead for years, the USA has been manufacturing the videos, and they decided on a PR victory now by “killing him (the most popular);
2. Osama’s still alive, and probably having gay sex with Elvis and the corpse of Hitler right now (ok, added the gay sex part myself, but it’s funny, so stay with me);
3. (Insert something with Roswell aliens, the Loch Ness monser, and trans-testicled midget porn…).

You get the point here.  There’s a conspiracy or ten afoot, all centered around the idea that the government is lying to us.

Now, to clarify, I’m sure the government doesn’t come even close to telling us the unvarnished truth.  And when there’s evidence that they are lying fucks, then I’m ready to call them on it.  But like the birth certificate issue just before, I have to use some common sense.  And Occam’s Razor.

Which is more likely of these two scenarios?

1. After a decade of intelligence work (which we know has been going on), and a raid on a compound in Pakistan (which was live tweeted by someone in town unrelated to the raid), our forces bagged Osama Bin Laden, which led President Obama to announce this shortly after the completion of the operation.  We then got our samples, took pics, and ditched the body.

2. President Bush (or some subordinate) had OBL killed, and either had the body kept or ditched, an actor stepped in, and they used the whole thing as a pretext to keep up two increasingly unpopular wars (of which there is no evidence).  This would have involved dozens of people who would have had to maintain the coverup for years.  THEN President Obama (or a subordinate) was let in on the secret, as well as many members of a new administration who was openly hostile to the previous one, and he held onto this secret for a couple years.  Then, when at most it would be a brief bump that would be forgotten by the time his reelection came around, he decided it was time for us to “find” and “kill” OBL, because this would wipe out the birther story and the gas price spike (as opposed to the Obamacare furor).  So that involved some people pretending to be in Pakistan tweeting and dropping shit on Facebook (Facebook sucks), a team “raiding” a compound  we set up with the Pakistanis years ago, then putting on a show on some ship at sea with the “body” to keep the big secret going.  Then there’s producing the video and pics, and….

This is why I tend to blow off the fucking conspirakooks.  Because while I believe the government is increasingly destructive to us and likes to keep secrets, I’m inclined to believe them when the explanation they give makes sense, and the “alternate theory” lacks any actual evidence.


About patrickmspeaks

Father, tech-head, political sage, and the Illustrious One of (little) 3x2 fame, I have been blogging for a few years now, and want to stretch in new directions, discover new things, and redefine redefining just for the fun of it. Nonetheless, having produced a pointless paragraph about me, I'll stop before something bursts.
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